inside

(Pre-Script: This post should be read as the song, "Keep Breathing," #16 on the playlist, plays in the background. Go down to the playlist, click on that song, then come back and resume reading. I'll wait...)(...still waiting...)

I'm waiting in the same place I always wait: inside.
outside is clean, calm, contained, outside, I am in
one piece and smiling in case anyone is recording this
or even noticing whether I was smiling or not right now.
inside,
a storm
and it's me,
i am the storm
and i grow bigger as I swirl around and around
within myself, picking up small things in my
centrifugal momentum, things i had forgotten,
things I thought I no longer cared about,
things I thought had already died of neglect,
but look here, see they were quietly waiting to
be storm tossed up into the atmosphere,
where I choke on them, I choke them
back down my throat
until the swirling recedes
in the place i always wait,
inside.

-XOXO,