Driving there

(Pre-Script: This post should be read as the song, "The End of the Innocence," #39, plays in the background. Go down to the playlist, click on that song, then come back and resume reading. I'll wait...)(...still waiting...)

Confession: If I am stuck in traffic with no way out and wearing nail polish, I will start to peel away at my nail polish like I'm peeling off an extra layer of skin, even though I know how demolished my fingernails will look once traffic lets up. I am not so good at handling a lack of margins. Some people can handle a lack, or they hide secret addictions to get through. Create space in a room inside where you are suffocating. I want to drive through life knowing there is a shoulder always there, always there, just in case. But some roads are too narrow. Often life feels like yesterday, when I was trying to merge on to the freeway that was going to take me someplace beautiful, wild, and free, but a large semi truck was blocking my way, (decide now, decide by your actions) and when I looked in the mirror to see if I had room, I caught a glimpse of a small girl with pigtails looking longing out the window and next to her, the boy with the bluest eyes.

-XOXO,