Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The beauy of seeing things through

(Pre-script: To get the most out of this post, please read it as the song," Loving a Person," by Sara Groves, plays...go down to the playlist, click on that song, then come back and resume reading...I'll wait...) (...still waiting...)

Will you still love me if I don't space and indent my various thoughts properly? (Don't answer that, it's totally rhetorical.) This morning when I woke up I rubbed my eyes, which you are not supposed to do, because "they" always tell you, "don't rub your eyes" it leads to eye bags, permanent lines, crows feet, on that delicate thin skinned but oh so noticeable area on your face. This is a major concern for someone like me, who tends towards dry skin, anyway, so the same phenomenon that kept my teenage skin clearer than some of my teenage peers is the same phenomenon that will also likely bring the wrinkles to my face sooner than it will to my more oily skinned peers. It's like, "kid, you had your fun when you were 17...step aside, it's time for those who suffered the worst acne to have fun now." I guess it's only fair...but still, it's TOTALLY not fair. But I rubbed my eyes this morning anyway, because when I wake up in the morning, I am sometimes not thinking clearly, I am still in some foggy dream state ,usually, and my only thought is"boy that was strange," or "wow, that was vivid," or "How is it that I am able to compose symphonies in my head as I sleep?" So it was in that state of mind that I found myself rub, rub, rubbing away at my eyes, and since I was already rubbing them, I figured, what the heck, go big, while I'm at it, and when I removed my hands from my eye area, my eyes felt happy. They did not itch. They were grateful, and clearer of vision. and then I slathered on the eye cream, oh yes, I slathered good, with at least as much enthusiasm as I had enlisted in the act of rubbing. but the cream stays on, so hopefully it will have extra benefits. It should also have extra benefits because I willed extra benefit power into it, like "Eye cream, wash over a multitude of eye rubbing sins..." But now, Will you still love me if my face starts to space and indent itself, so that all of the feelings I have ever had become evident there, even when I am not currently feeling or thinking any one them? You don't have to answer that. It's totally rhetorical; don't answer that...because you will feel compelled to say "yes, of course we will." You will confidently answer that question "yes" because you'll think it's your duty to assure me, but you will not have thought the question through seriously. So I do not want you to anwer that. I will always love myself, and so will God.


P.S. And if I love myself then I will be able to love you. "Love your neighbor as yourself." assumes that you already love yourself first...the degree to which you love yourself is the degree to which you will be able to love someone else.

1 comment:

It aint all about the cabinets said...

Yeah - and I have total bags under my eyes. I think it's from 15 years of pulling down my bottom eyelid to put my contacts in. Do you think that if I rub my eyes every day then I'll get lines and wrinkles so that no one will notice the bags?