Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Warning: If you are a person with no sarcastic or cynical tendencies whatsoever, please go back to your mac'n'cheese...*

(Pre-script: this post will be better digested when paired with an open mind, a strong beverage, whatever your idea of a "Strong beverage" is, and the song:" Closer." by Joshua Radin. Please go down to the playlist, click on that song, then come back and resume reading. I'll wait.) (...still waiting...and please take note of the fact that I am waiting with a smile and direct eye contact...regardless of how I may or may not be feeling.)
Y'all, the Januaries were back in full force today.
Apparently they have a collective understanding: "Invade the gym on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. This is the way to new year bliss. This is the way to accomplish our goals and make all of our wildest dreams come true...until we slowly taper off and get back to status quo by February."
Was I annoyed?
Heck yes!!
And here's the secret, peeps. It's okay that I was annoyed. It's okay that I feel however I feel, and it's okay to write about my own feelings on my own blog. Feelings are what they are. I do not, no not need to be scolded or guilted because of it. Y'all, I am smart enough to think up the other side of the issue by myself, thank you very much. I do NOT need to hold hands and sing "Kumbaya" with every January I encounter at the gym to be expressing the love of Jesus. Besides, I am pretty sure that even Jesus, the Son of God Himself, felt irritated with people, even people He was sometimes being nice to.

*...because I don't actually trust you.


It aint all about the cabinets said...

I was trying to think, WWJD? And then it came to me. If Jesus was at the YMCA, I think it would be a cross between the turning over of the temple tables and the feeding of the 5000. First, anyone at the gym with wrong motives would be immediately ejected from their treadmill and thereby be launched into whatever was behind them. (Of course if they were somehow injured during this, then He would heal them.) And for everyone else, Jesus would simply just ask someone to relinquish their treadmill, pick it up (because the laws of physics do not apply to Him) break it into a bunch of pieces and then hand them out to everybody waiting. And then when everyone had a machine, He would have the staff pick up the extra 12,000 treadmills and line them up on Santa Theresa so that everyone in the area could work out. Because I don't think Jesus is so into club memberships, either.

Michelle said...

What in the world are "wrong motives" on a treadmill, Derek?!?

smalls said...


I am the anti-January. I am simply avoiding the gym altogether so as to avoid them. It has nothing to do with the fact that I am a lazy, unemployed bum who can barely be motivated to get the mail these days. Nope, nothing at all.


I'm working on another new purse today - hopefully it will be done and ready to show you tonight! xoxo